9 Common Misconceptions About the Divorce Process: What’s the Truth?

Divorce is often surrounded by numerous misconceptions and misunderstandings, which can add unnecessary stress and confusion to an already challenging process. For those considering or going through a divorce in California, it is crucial to separate fact from fiction. Kaspar & Lugay, LLP, aims to clarify common misconceptions about the divorce process and explain how it actually works.

Misconception 1: Divorce Is Always Contentious and Acrimonious

Reality: Not All Divorces Are Contentious

One of the most pervasive myths is that all divorces are bitter and contentious. While some divorces can be fraught with conflict, many couples manage to part ways amicably. In California, the legal system encourages amicable resolutions through mediation and collaborative law, which focus on cooperation and mutual agreement rather than adversarial litigation.

Mediation involves a neutral third party who helps both spouses reach a mutually satisfactory agreement. Collaborative law involves each spouse hiring a lawyer trained in collaborative practice to negotiate a settlement. These alternatives often result in less emotional and financial strain than traditional litigation.

Misconception 2: Mothers Always Get Custody of the Children

Reality: Custody Decisions Are Based on the Best Interests of the Child

Another common misconception is that mothers are always awarded custody of their children. In California, custody decisions are made based on the best interests of the child, not gender. The court considers various factors, including the child’s health, safety, welfare, and the nature of the child’s relationship with each parent.

California courts often favor joint custody arrangements, where both parents share responsibility for raising the child. Joint custody can be joint legal custody (both parents make important decisions for the child) or joint physical custody (the child spends significant time with both parents).

Misconception 3: Divorce Is a Quick Process

Reality: Divorce Can Be Lengthy

Some believe that divorce is a quick process that can be finalized in a few weeks. In reality, even the simplest cases in California take at least six months due to the mandatory waiting period. More complex cases can take much longer, depending on the issues involved and the level of cooperation between the parties.

Several factors can affect the duration of the process, including:

• The complexity of the case: High-asset divorces or those involving business interests, real estate, or retirement accounts can take longer to resolve.
• Disputes over custody or support: Disagreements over child custody, spousal support, or division of assets can prolong the process.
• Court schedules: The availability of the court and the caseload of the judge can also impact the timeline.

Misconception 4: You Need Grounds to File for Divorce

Reality: California Is a No-Fault Divorce State

Some individuals believe that they need to prove wrongdoing by their spouse to file for divorce. However, California is a no-fault divorce state, meaning you do not need to provide a reason other than “irreconcilable differences” to end your marriage. This no-fault approach aims to reduce conflict and simplify the process.

Misconception 5: Marital Assets Are Always Split 50/50

Reality: Equitable Does Not Always Mean Equal

A common misconception is that marital assets are always split 50/50 during marital dissolutions. In California, community property laws dictate that assets and debts acquired during the marriage are to be divided equally. However, what constitutes “equal” can be complex and does not always mean a straightforward 50/50 split.

Understanding the distinction between community and separate property is crucial. Community property includes assets and debts acquired during the marriage, while separate property includes assets owned before the marriage or acquired by gift or inheritance. Properly identifying and valuing these assets is essential for an equitable division.

Misconception 6: Spousal Support Is Guaranteed

Reality: Spousal Support Is Not Automatic

Many people assume that spousal support (alimony) is guaranteed in a divorce. In reality, spousal support is not automatic. It depends on various factors, including the length of the marriage, the standard of living during the marriage, and the financial needs and abilities of both spouses.

Misconception 7: You Can Handle Divorcing Without Legal Assistance

Reality: Professional Guidance Is Crucial

Some individuals believe they can handle their split without legal assistance to save money. While it is possible to navigate the process without an attorney, it is not advisable, especially in complex cases. Divorcing involves significant legal and financial issues that can have long-term consequences.

Hiring an experienced attorney can provide several benefits. They can help you understand your rights and obligations, negotiate a fair settlement, and protect your rights throughout the process.

Misconception 8: Divorce Is the Only Legal Way to End a Marriage

Reality: Other Legal Options Exist

While divorcing is the most common way to end a marriage, it is not the only option. In California, couples can also consider legal separation or annulment, depending on their circumstances.

Legal separation allows couples to live separately and address issues like asset division and child custody without terminating the marriage. This option is suitable for those who have religious or personal reasons for not divorcing. Meanwhile, annulment declares the marriage null and void, as if it never existed. Annulments are granted in specific situations, such as fraud, bigamy, or incapacity to consent to the marriage.

Misconception 9: Divorce Will Solve All Your Problems

Reality: Divorce Is Not a Cure-All

Some individuals believe that divorce will solve all their personal and financial problems. While divorces can provide a fresh start, they are not a cure-all. It is important to address underlying issues, seek support, and plan for the future to ensure a positive transition.

Post-divorce planning involves setting realistic expectations, seeking counseling or support groups, and creating a financial plan to ensure stability and growth after the divorce.

Make Sure You Understand Divorce With Skilled Legal Advice

Divorce is a complex and emotionally charged process, often clouded by misconceptions and myths. Understanding the realities of the divorce process in California can help individuals navigate this challenging time with greater clarity and confidence. Kaspar & Lugay, LLP, is dedicated to providing accurate information and expert legal support to help you through every step of your journey. If you have any questions or need assistance, do not hesitate to reach out to our experienced team.